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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27448171">Agony of a Luz</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForbiddenRoyal/pseuds/ForbiddenRoyal'>ForbiddenRoyal</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Owl House (Cartoon)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>ANGSTY ANGST ANGST, Takes place after that episode, but it has a happy ending, dont worry im not that cruel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 03:07:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,556</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27448171</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForbiddenRoyal/pseuds/ForbiddenRoyal</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"…Eda's, Eda's gone." My voice shakes as I let the truth sink in. She's gone, too far gone to ever bring her back.</p><p>So basically this fic takes place right after THAT episode (agony of a witch) and it has my headcannons for what happened afterwards. When I originally wrote and posted it of ffn the season finale hadn't come out, so keep that in mind when reading! Anyways, there's lots of tears, Lumity, and love from everyone in the Owl House. Enjoy!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Amity Blight/Luz Noceda</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Agony of a Luz</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello again! This is my most loved fic on ffn so I decided that would be what I'm cross-posting next! I'm going to keep cross-posting my fics here every week or so until I have them all. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one! I loved writing it and am so proud of how it turned out!! :D</p><p>Disclaimer: I don't own anything of the owl house, just the idea for this fic</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> This is the cover image for this fic. I am very proud of myself for this one! It's one of my best drawings yet! I hope you like it! Now...on with the fic!</p>
<hr/><p>Eda she…and Owlbert he…and the, the curse it…Eda she’s, she’s…Lilith she cursed…“I’m going away and I don’t know if I can bounce back this time”…going away…going away…going away…EDA NO!…“Watch after King and remember to feed Hooty”…watch after King…feed Hooty…watch after King…feed Hooty…King and Hooty…King and Hooty…all that's left…“You should go home”…go home…go home…GO HOME…gone forever…captured…all alone…EDA!!!…gone…gone…gone…my fault…it’s my-</p><p>“IT’S ALL MY FAULT!” I scream, a raw gutteral sound I didn’t even know I could make claws its way out of my throat. My knees give out and I collapse on the ground. I’ve been walking all night long, as far from the emperor's castle as possible. I have no idea where the Owl House is, but my feet seemed to know where they were going. I look around and see that I’m in the middle of a forest. Perfect, no no one can hear my heart shattering into a million pieces. My eyes lift up to the moon, glowing so brightly. A moon that has no right to share its glow with us and make this night beautiful. A moon that now only reminds me of what was. Just a few days ago, that very same moon shone down on Amity and I as we happily danced the Grom away. Gotta say, that moment was one of my favorites from my time here on the Boiling Isles. A moment that was ruined by my need to be a hero and save Eda. </p><p>I’m no hero…no hero…no hero…I’m WEAK…weak…weak…couldn’t even face my own fear…Eda was right…WEAK…couldn’t save Eda…wasn’t strong enough…never strong enough…WEAK…should have stayed home…home…home…Mami was right…they were both right…fantasy only gets me hurt…WEAK…all alone…all alone…all alone…all-     </p><p>“I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!” I scream again and clutch my head as if that can repel the memories of what just went down. As if that can silence Eda’s voice in my head. “EDA’S GONE AND IT’S ALL MY FAULT!” My eyes widen as they realize what they’ve just said. Tears flood their way down my face and I wish I could just drown in them. </p><p>“…Eda’s, Eda’s gone.” My voice shakes as I let the truth sink in. She’s gone, too far gone to ever bring her back. Eda, my Eda, is gone. The one who took me in when I had no idea what was going on is gone. The one who taught me how to do magic, live my dream is gone. The one who loved me as her own…is <em> gone. </em> It feels almost like I’ve lost my mother, or like I’ve lost a part of myself. The best part. I clutch my stomach and <em> scream</em>. I scream and scream until I can’t breathe. I sob hysterically, gasping and choking as tears mix with snot and stream down my face in an endless flow. I have no control anymore, all I can feel is pain. My heart <em> aches </em>and my throat burns. My mind goes numb as the pain consumes me, much like how the curse… I scream again and punch the dirt as hard as I can. It hurts like crazy but I keep going, hoping that the physical pain will dull the throbbing of my heart. I punch and scream, punch and scream, punch and scream ‘till my knuckles bleed. I stop, gasping for breath. My hands sting, and my heart throbs even more. </p><p>I whimper and hug my knees to my chest. I draw in one shaky breath after the other, tears silently flowing down my face. I have nothing more to give. No more anger, no more fear, no more sadness, nothing. I feel hollow inside, like an empty shell of a person. Soon my breathing evens out, and quickly after my tears run dry. I take one final deep breath before standing. I pull out one of my too-cheerfully colored band-aids and stick it across my knuckles. Eda wouldn’t want this. She wouldn’t want me screaming and hurting myself in the middle of the woods. I dust myself off and let my mind go blank. All the pain, and agony from tonight slides away. This probably isn’t a good sign, I’m probably in shock or something but at this point I don’t care. I just let my feet guide me home as fast as possible.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>“Oh Luz, there you are!” Hooty yawns, the early sun lighting up his features. I numbly reach for the door, responding with a half-hearted “hey Hooty”. I take a deep breath and walk into the Owl House. Has it always been this dark? I glance around the room, the silence and emptiness of it closing in on me. My gaze lands on something that was definitely not there when I left this place this morning. My eyes adjust and I see that there's a cake and a bundle of fabric tied with a bow lying on the table. A choked sob escapes my throat. Eda she…she had this whole surprise for me. She was waiting for me to get home. Then she had to…had to…</p><p>“Haha! The cake is me!” King pops out of the cake, pausing my train of thought. I almost smile, the gesture warming my heart. Then King opens his mouth again. “Wait, where’s Eda?” My eyes widen and I feel new unshed tears spring to the corners of them. My hand flies up to my mouth as I let out another sob. My knees give out and I sink to the ground. I'm quickly joined by King and Hooty, who both wrap around me reassuringly. We stay like that for a few minutes, me sobbing uncontrollably, King and Hooty crying in confusion and fear. Finally Hooty speaks up.</p><p>“Does this have anything to do with the staff those two other kids brought yesterday?”</p><p>“Sadly,” I say, “It has everything to do with that.” I proceed to tell them about the events that occurred last night. I watch as their faces evolve from anger at me being kidnapped, to awe as I describe the sheer power Eda possessed, to shock as they hear Lilith was the one who cursed Eda, to fear as they hear I was almost impaled, until they finally settled on sadness as I tell them Eda’s last words and explain how the curse took over once and for all. </p><p>“Wow, so Eda’s really…she’s…” Kings tries to choke out, tears streaming down his face for real now that he knows what happened.</p><p>“She’s gone.” Hooty finishes for him. </p><p>“No,” King cries, “She can’t be! There, there has to be some way to get her back! We just got to try!”</p><p>“King,” I say softly, “Eda could barely hold Lilith off, so how do you suppose we get her back?” King screams in anguish and starts kicking the wall, acting much like I did last night. I sigh and let him go at it until he exhausts himself. He lets out one last scream then curls up into a shaking ball. I start to reach out to him, then sigh and pull my hand back. I’m as much a mess as he is, so how much help do I really think I’ll be? I bring my knees to my chest and watch as Hooty moves to the table where the cake and package is. He picks up the bundle of fabric in his beak and brings it back over to me.</p><p>“What, what is it?” I ask.</p><p>“Why don’t you open it and find out.” Hooty responds. I pull at the red ribbon and it gives way easily. I guess Eda’s gift wrapping skills aren’t as impressive as her witching skills are. I unfold the fabric and hold it up to see what it is. It kinda looks like…a…cloak?!</p><p>“NO!” I screech, dropping the cloak. “NONONONONO!!"</p><p>“Wait, Luz? What’s the matter? I thought you would love it?” King asks, having crawled back from his corner. He looks almost angry, as if my reaction to Eda’s gift would taint her memory.</p><p>“This-this cloak was made from that witch wool stuff! The one Eda claimed she needed to protect herself from Lilith and the coven! But instead of using it to protect herself she used it to create a cloak for me, <em> ME</em>!! So now, because of <em> me </em> Eda is GONE!!!” All the previous anger from King’s face disappears as I finish my rant. He whimpers and crawls under the cloak and pulls it with him as he settles himself in my lap. I absent-mindedly pet him as fresh tears trek down my cheeks. I stare out the window and see that the sun is already high and bright. People would be going about their days at this point. I should be saying goodbye to Eda and heading off to school. Now I can’t even think about school. I can’t imagine ever entering those halls the same way again. As the same <em> person </em> again. I watch as flowers bloom outside and birds sing, and the pit in my heart gets bigger and bigger. I can’t stay here anymore, I need to get away, to go somewhere else. I stand up abruptly and King tumbles out of my lap.</p><p>“Ow! What was that for!”</p><p>“C’mon King. I need to get somewhere less sunny.”</p><p>“Can I come too?”</p><p>“Yeah, Hooty. You can come.” I walk away and don’t look back to see who’s following. Little footsteps are the only indication I have that King is a few steps behind me. I pass my bedroom door and keep going. My bed won’t provide the comfort I need right now, only one place will. I push open the door, the light from the hallway illuminating Eda’s nest. I wipe at my eyes one final time before entering. I get in the nest, curl into a ball and close my eyes tight. A few moments later, King’s squeezing his way into my ball and wraps the cloak around us both. I hug King close to me and Hooty joins us. He wraps his neck body around me twice then rests his head on my back. I think back on the events of the past 24 hours and silently cry myself to sleep. </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>I don't know how long it’s been since we moved from the nest. Hours, days, weeks perhaps. Willow and Gus have both tried to stop by a few times, but Hooty keeps telling them that I have a very contagious human disease and am too sick to receive guests. I haven’t eaten in who knows how long, I haven’t had a good, nightmare-free sleep in even longer, and I haven’t left Eda’s nest since that morning. I have, however, been trying to make good on my promise to Eda. I tell Hooty to eat every day, and he encourages me to right back. I’m taking care of King and forcing him to get some rest, which he refuses to do unless I do too. All in all, we’re all failing at life and Eda’s last request. </p><p>“Guys,” I start, slowly sitting up with the cloak wrapped firmly around me, “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t sit around and mope and wait for something - anything to happen. We need to take action!”</p><p>“Oh, ho ho, I like where you’re going with this!” King says, jumping into my lap. He sits up straight and waits expectantly for me to continue.</p><p>“Eda’s not coming back,” As I say this the energy in King deflates and he shrinks back, all hope vanishing from his eyes. “At least, not without our help!”</p><p>“BOO-YA!” King shouts, hope for Eda just pouring out of him. Seeing him so happy starts to slightly lift my spirits - it’s nowhere near enough to be okay again, but for the first time in forever I’m feeling something other than complete and total devastation.</p><p>“Well then, let's get to work!” I crawl to the edge of the nest and grab my notebook. I flip to the first page and show King and Hooty what each glyph means. King tries to tap one but I hold him back, explaining that those glyphs are meant to be copied. He smiles knowingly and grabbing his own notebook, starts drawing. I turn to Hooty and explain the event of that crazy moon slumber party. His face lights up when I tell him that he could walk, and how I need him to figure out how to do it again. He nods and gets to work connecting with his other parts of the house. And now, it’s my turn. I look out the window and start studying all parts of the Boiling Isles. The trees, the dirt, the air, everything. I pull out a sheet of paper and start copying every glyph I see. I have no idea what they can do yet, but there will be plenty of time to practice on the Emperor and his coven goons.</p><p>A few more days pass (this time I’m actually keeping track) and preparations are going well. The three of us are gathered in the nest - I still haven’t left - and we’re going over what we still need to do. </p><p>“I have a few more circle thingys I need to copy.” King says, sifting through his cards. He keeps touching them to see if they’ll light up like they do for me, but nothings happening. He shrugs and moves into my lap.</p><p>“What about you Hooty? Have you learned how to walk yet?”</p><p>“Nope! But I have come in touch with so much more of my abilities! Watch!” Hooty laughs and the room starts shaking. King and I look up to see the roof separating and opening, like a sunroof in a car would do. The sunlight shines through and I hiss as it blinds me. I’ve become so accustomed to hardly any light. Hooty shuts it again and smiles at me. </p><p>“That’s cool, I guess, but it’s not nearly enough to stop Lilith and rescue Eda! Keep trying to walk.” Hooty sighs and lays his head down in the nest, closing his eyes in concentration.</p><p>Suddenly he bolts up and lets us know that there’s someone approaching the door. A few seconds later I hear a loud knock. I turn over in the nest, hug the cloak around my head and wait for Hooty to tell them off. A couple minutes pass and the person knocks again. </p><p>“Hooty! Tell the person to leave already! I don’t want to see anyone!” I shout. Hooty doesn’t say anything and I assume that’s because he told the person to go away. We’re so close to rescuing Eda, and I can’t have anyone get in my way. I wait a few more minutes and don’t hear anymore knocking. I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding and close my eyes, feeling very tired all of a sudden. When was the last time I’d slept? Like, actually slept? A few days ago? A week ago? I don’t know and I don’t really care either. I won't rest until we get Eda back safe.</p><p>“Luz? Are you in here?” A familiar voice calls out. My eyes fly open and I move the cloak enough to see. And guess who’s standing in Eda’s room’s doorway. None other than Miss Amity Blight. I glare at Hooty and he looks down sheepishly.</p><p>“Sorry, but this girl scares me!” He says.</p><p>“Amity. What are you doing here.” I demand.</p><p>“Well, you haven’t been at school the past few weeks, and I asked Willow and Gus about and well they said you had some sort of disease and told me about Eda’s curse and your plan to use the healing hat to save her, and how you were kidnapped and Eda went to save you, and how they haven’t really seen you since and I, well I was worried about you and my legs all healed now so I decided to stop by and see how you are doing!” Amity’s face reddens and she smiles awkwardly at me. I feel my own face heat up and I can’t help but smile back. That was really sweet of Amity. Going out of her way to make sure I was okay. What a great friend! <em> No. </em> I shake my head and quickly clear those thoughts. <em> You have a mission to complete. Amity will just be a distraction. </em> I sit up and turn to King, who’s been awfully quiet during this whole ordeal. </p><p>“Are those cards copied?” I ask, putting my game face on. </p><p>“The glyphs will be operational!” King cheerfully responds. I nod, standing up and marching out of the room. I don’t even look at Amity as I walk past. I just stare straight ahead and make my way to the front door. </p><p>“Good, then lets go- what?” I jump back in surprise as the door slams in my face.</p><p>“Are you going to face Lilith now?” Hooty asks, appearing right next to me.</p><p>“Yes.” I respond, prying at the door. “Open…” </p><p>“My job is to protect Eda and those she loves.”</p><p>“Exactly! Protecting and saving Eda! That’s what we’ve been preparing for this past week!”</p><p>“No. That's what <em> you’ve </em> been preparing for this past week. I’ve been getting in touch with my other features in this house so I can stop you from going.”</p><p>“W-what! Why?!”</p><p>“This is not what Eda would have wanted.”</p><p>“Hooty’s right, Luz.” Amity starts, laying a comforting hand on my shoulder, “You just went through a hard loss, and at the moment, in your current mental state, you won’t be able to take on Lilith - much less Emperor Belos himself.”</p><p>“I don’t care! I need to save Eda.”</p><p>“No. What you need to do is save yourself. You will be of no help to Eda right now. And are you really willing to kill Lilith? Will killing her really improve your emotional torment?”</p><p>“I-I don’t…” </p><p>“And will killing her really subside your guilt for getting Eda captured in the first place? Or will it just add on to it for killing another living being?”</p><p>“Hooty. Open this door.” Hooty just shakes his head as Amity continues.</p><p>“And especially since this being is Eda’s <em> sister.</em>” That’s it. I clench my fists and feel tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.</p><p>“T-that’s why I need to go even more! Lilith betrayed Eda. Eda’s own sister put a curse on her and let her get this far gone - even though she's had the power to remove it this entire time! That’s why I need to go. If you can’t trust family, then who <em> can </em> you trust?”</p><p>“Well, you, for starters. You are the kindest, most thoughtful - sometimes stupidest - person I know. And listen to me Luz, I don’t think Eda would have done what she’d done if she didn’t know you would be around afterwards.”</p><p>“But-but I can’t just leave her! Can’t leave her to die, or become a puppet to the emperor!”</p><p>“And I’m not saying we’re going to leave her behind. I’m saying, we need to regroup and come up with a plan to defeat the emperor instead of just rushing in there blindly. We’ll be no help to Eda if we can’t hold our own against our foes.”</p><p>“Wait, ‘we’?”</p><p>“Yes Luz, we. You didn’t think I’d send you in there alone, did you now?”</p><p>“But your dream to join the Emperor's Coven! You’re just going to throw that all away?”</p><p>“You’re my…friend, Luz, and I’d choose you over a coven any day. Covens are like the clubs at school, just another way for people to feel more popular, or powerful. And while it would be awesome to be a part of the most popular, and it would do wonders to my social life, they took it too far when they kidnapped you - an innocent bystander I might add - and cursed and captured Eda. I know Eda’s technically a wanted criminal, but threatening you to get her to use up all of her magic and become a cursed Owl they can then use for their own self-gain is not cool. Not cool at all.”</p><p>“Oh Amity,” This time the tears really do fall, but they're tears of hope and love, not sadness and despair. I wrap my arms tight around Amity and she stiffens at first then relaxes to my touch. I whisper a ‘thank you’ and I don’t know if she heard me, but I think she did because she hugs me even tighter. After a few minutes I start to calm down. We pull apart slightly, but Amity doesn’t take her hand fully off her shoulder. </p><p>“Better?” She whispers, and I nod. I’m nowhere near perfect, and Eda’s still captured, but I’m better.</p><p>“Eda may be gone, but I’m Luz Noceda. And I’ll never give up until she’s back!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey thank you for reading! If you enjoyed please leave kudos or if you could spare a few moments leave a review! It makes me so happy to hear from you guys and what you thought about my fic! You guys are what inspireand motivate me to keep writing, even when it seems impossible so thank you!</p><p> </p><p>Edit: GUYS GUYS I FOUND A SECRET CODE HIDDEN IN THE EPISODE TITLES!!!! If you take the first letter of each episode it spells a message out! It says: A WITCH LOSES A TRUE WAY!! </p><p>I AM FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW! THIS IS INSANE!! I bet the next season will continue the message, and say something like: but can find it again if... and then if theres another season it will just keep going!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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